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Fuckin Bloody Christ Jesus in Bloody Heaven [28 Sep 2003|12:20am] So my life fucking sucks. No, more like falling the hell apart. Being a parent really changes everything...it does. Including certain relations. Let's just put it this way...Isabella is my life these days. Now and forever. I think I need to go. I wish it would all end. I love you, Keri, I really do. Know that. I'm going to attempt to sleep. 12 comments|post comment

......this is it...... [19 Sep 2003|11:11pm] Well, I guess this is it. Everyone predicted it...but I guess it's really, really over this time. Earlier today I received the letters in the mail from Mark and Christian and Diane, our manager, mutually agreeing to break up. I just have the sign across a dotted line. It's like a sudden divorce, you know? I really just am in shock, I never thought it would end, I just thought we would go on break and...*sigh* but the more I think about it the more I realize I guess it SHOULD be said and done. I love you, Mark and Christian. 9 comments|post comment

[15 Sep 2003|10:19pm] I guess I should go through with a substantial update. I've been so busy lately...it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out why if you've ready Keri's journal. We had the baby *smiles* yep. Isabella Grace McNally was born September 6th, 2003...and wow, has life changed since then. But it's amazing...and funny too, I don't even mind the 2 am wake-up calls and constant "wah wah wah!" Actually Isabella isn't too much of a cry baby...we've been blessed...I hope she keeps that up, and if not, it's worth it. Alright, so I'm completely used to taking care of Isabella even after a week that anti-social I guess is my fate in life *chuckles* that's okay. I could probably go on and on about every single, small detail of her but I'll spare you guys. I'll have a better update later...I hope...if not, I'm online and you can talk to me. 4 comments|post comment

[07 Sep 2003|10:27am] Last few days have been interesting to say the least. I'll elaborate a little later. Gizmo got stuck between two walls and me and Keri had to help get him out, which I guess was a distraction from our thoughts these days. That was pretty tramautic and he sprained his ankle. That's what he gets for getting into mischief! Eh, oh well. He can only ever be a cat...*snickers* I'm biting my tongue to say it, but two people know. I think I'll let her do the honours when the time comes... 3 comments|post comment

home, home at last [26 Aug 2003|01:08am] *He's so very, very tired. He boarded the plane early morning in England, now the moon greets him after a long flight* *He stammers to find his keys in his carryon bag, he gets the door open...finally...and shh's the dog as she runs up to him with a tail wag and a quiet whine* *He looks around the dark house, taking in the scene, only observing the furnature's sihloettes; almost tripping, he continues up the stairs* *He flicks the light on in the nursey and a warm light appears from the corner, revealing a rocking chair, crib, some toys, bassinette, decorations, you name it...the room is complete* *He smiles lightly and flicks the light switch off, only to walk a little way until he opens the door to the master bedroom* *The moon is shining in over the bed and the french doors are open just a little, enough to make the curtains appear to be sailing* *He follows the moonlight and sees her, his wife, Keri, who else...asleep on her side peacefully, her arms cuddled around a fluffy pillow, his pillow* *He smiles warmly and drops his suitcase quietly and gets ready for bed* *After preparing for bed, he sits on the bed quietly and moves up against the pillows just a little as not to wake sleeping beauty* *He gets in the covers and looks at her, smiling to himself. He doesn't touch her, he doesn't want to scare her* He lays down on his side and drapes an arm on her hip, breaths her in, and closes his eyes* *A kiss is planted on her shoulder as he thinks "it's good to be home, it's good to be home indeed"* 3 comments|post comment

[21 Aug 2003|10:55pm] Just call me anti-social. I get to go home in six days...*grins* this whole thing has been awesome but coming home to life is going to be like pudding...haha... I don't have much to say. Beg me enough and I'll get on AIM? ( Song that's stuck in my head ) 12 comments|post comment

[15 Aug 2003|10:49am] What's everyone been up to lately? Me..I've been really busy lately, STILL in England, coming home in about 12 days...*sighs* yeah.Time is running in slow motion even though it's a rush, it's weird. If that makes any sense? Probably not. I've really been shabby updating lately *frown* Anyway... Not to sound too cliched emo here but...where's normality when I desperately need it? 2 comments|post comment

OOC [08 Aug 2003|11:54pm] ( Non-important OOC notice ) 2 comments|post comment

[06 Aug 2003|06:48pm] Being on tour with a band that's not BBMak and not being the center of attention is certainly interesting. Being in the back is almost like a relief though, because you don't have people watching you 24/7 if you screw up. At the same time, I really miss touring with the lads. Not that the Real People guys are bad, they're just not Mark and Christian. Oh well...*looks up for a sec, then looks back down at his keys* I get home August 27th. Ironic. A year ago from that day I was in Southern California, Orange County. Into Your Head had just come out that day. We met some awesome fans, performed a short gig. We were optimistic about the album. Kerri had broken up with me a month before that...the same day. What's with August 27th that I don't understand? I'll make a bitter update later...*bites lip and clicks post entry, going back to bed* 10 comments|post comment

Big update time [29 Jul 2003|09:30pm] *sits down at my computer and waits impatiently as it boots up, clicks Blurty and positions the computer more comfortably in front of him* *rests my wrists on the laptop and cracks knuckles, sighing softly and sneaking an ironic smirk* You ever wake up, think about your accomplishments in your career, and just feel like tossing it down the crapper? You know...it's so insignificant when you actually have real priorities ahead of you, with real people who will always love you for you, not for your status or your face. Never thought in a million years I, Ste McNally, at 25, would have everything so securely. It just felt like yesterday I met her...*smiles softly* Started thinking about it when I saw J.D.'s update about Love. I remember when I asked her...god it was impulsive, but some things you just know are right. I looked at her, she looked at me, and it was just...*chuckles* it was like that, it was just so god damn perfect. Wouldn't be an exagguration if I said I saw the rest of my life flash before my eyes... *snickers* Almost seven months later, I'm going to be a daddy...A DAD. I'm bringing something in this world, something that is just the most perfect, amazing, beautiful combination of the both of us...I know this is getting cheesy, but I just...it's just so... I'm speechless, I really am. I feel so dumbstruck. Started talking with my dad and he give me that father to child look and patted me on the back. I don't know what the future will bring with me and my life, but I know that I just can't wait to look Isabella in the eye and give her the same look and atleast try to give her advice. Maybe I wont suck too bad at this job. *smiles* *blinks a tear and dries my cheek with left fist, closes my eyes tightly for a second then opens them again, looking back at the screen* Thank you, baby. I love you...so much. Where are you when I need you these nights? My friends, I love you. Christian, Mark, Nick, J.D., Love, Eliza, Alyssa, Ewan, Ali (bye..), John, Maj, everyone else who I missed, I'm really not all that popular...but anyway, thank you. THANK YOU. I love you guys...all of you. I've just needed to think. When you're by yourself in damp England it feels like all you can really do. Til next time... *rakes a hand through my hair then rests my hands back on the computer, moving index finger over the touch pad and clicking "post"* 16 comments|post comment

[23 Jul 2003|09:24pm] I really wish I knew what to say. I'm so tired, drowsy, lonely...but time home has been great. I ummm, ran into something interesting the other day...having to do with my past, but we really don't want to get into that now do we? I don't know if I'll get on AIM...but hey, I'll try. My head sorta hurts. Hi, Keri. *smiles* You'll get something in the mail tomorrow. Christian...I'm so sorry, bro, damn..that's just...I can't imagine how that would feel, I'd be so devastated. If you need me, I'm here. Nick and JC, congrats again. 4 comments|post comment

[16 Jul 2003|11:43pm] Happy birthday to Natasha, hope it's a good one. Mothergooserocks.com simply rocks. I'm in England for a couple weeks for Real People rehearsals plus a small UK tour. Oh yeah, and my life sucks. 6 comments|post comment

Well... [14 Jul 2003|11:42am] I was looking at my watch today and I realized today would be a damn good time to update so I wouldn't get kicked out. Not a whole lot has happened lately. I've been keeping myself locked in my studio woking on tracks with The Real People. I have a few melodies and guitar riffs and chords that I'm dying to play for them either in person or via phone or mail. By the way...for those who don't know who The Good People are...they're a Liverpool-based pop-rock band. They're very good. They asked me to go on tour with them in a month and play the guitar. I've never toured with anyone except BBMak, so at first it was a shock...but then, I said I would. So...yeah. That's what I'm doing. Going on tour with The Real People. I know that I have a baby girl on the way in four months and I feel a little on the weird side leaving Keri in her state, but I'll get back long before she's born, and Keri told me her mum or sister or both can come down and watch her. And I trust you guys will help out a little or a lot so I don't feel like crap too. ANYWAYS, that's all I know of what to say. See you guys later! 11 comments|post comment

[07 Jul 2003|01:58pm] Just to start out, I don't know about anyone else...but all these recent deaths are turning into a little bit of the crazy side. They say this stuff comes in three's but four people died in two weeks. Two weeks! It's bloody crazy. Buddy Ebsen, Catherine Hepburn, Barry White, and Gregory Peck, I think. All the legends are dying off at once, it's like a sweep. Oh well.... For my birthday I went out for a drink or ten with Nick at this little, quaint pub by the park. Saw fireworks from the window, they were spectacular...but I really wished Keri could have been there. She didn't come. She stayed home...she insisted. Really, she didn't have to, I would have loved her to be there, but I guess because I was drinking it wouldn't have been the best environment. I came back and she was sound asleep and just looked so pretty. Sally was crashed up next to her on her legs and I called her off the bed quietly and laid next to her. It took me a while to fall asleep, I just laid there gazing at her...she's all I ever need. I get reminded of that constantly, especially when it's just quiet and still and I take a look at her. She's so much more then I could ever ask for. *runs his hands through his hair* My birthday was pretty good, I don't feel older yet *chuckles* Thanks everyone for their birthday messages, you all were really too, too nice. Christian's moving up the block *laughs* look's like we're moving, Keri! Just kidding. I know what house you're talkin' about, Chris, and me and Keri even checked that one out. It was on the market when we were looking. Good choice. I leave you... 4 comments|post comment

[04 Jul 2003|07:49am] Hope everyone who is American has a nice independence day, don't get too drunk ya'heeeere! I'll get on AIM in a sec and then I gotta go very soon and have some real FUN on my birthday! Yay I love birthdays...Nick, thanks again. ( OOC ) 13 comments|post comment

[03 Jul 2003|11:27am] Can't talk much, on my way out, just wanted to say.... IT'S A VERY IMPORTANT PERSON'S BIRTHDAY TOMORROW *points to sidebar* That's it. 6 comments|post comment

Hum dee dum dee dum dee doo... [01 Jul 2003|01:43pm] I have to say the surprise party for me on Sunday was exactly that. I had an ultimate blast...thanks Ali, Christian, Mark, Meadow, Nick...everyone else who was there and those who couldn't be. Especially Keri...you know you didn't have to, but thanks a million anyway, love. *grins* My life has been pretty normal. Nothing has really happened. Rachael, Christian, John...I forgot to mention, keep your chins up, this is a blessing in disguise. I just know it. Regardless to how rediculous this is going to sound...WHERE'RE THE BOYS AT?! *smiles* I need to talk with quite a few of the men here...about something happening with my birthday on friday *smirks* Nick and I have got something up our sleeves. Nevermind *laughs* 9 comments|post comment

Hmm.......!! [29 Jun 2003|08:24am] [begins pointless update] *picks up his guitar and strums the chords to "Are You Happy Now?" by Michelle Branch pitch perfect* *grins finally, as he had been practicing that all night the night before* Woo...*keeps strumming it til he's had his fill and changes the song* Sunday, Monday, Happy Days, Tuesday, Wednedsday, Happy Days, Thursday, Friday, Happy Days, Saturday, what a day, cruisin' all week with yoooou.....these days are aaares, ooh happy days, these days are aaare, oh happy days...these days are ours, these days are ours for you and me, happy days! *stops* You idiot. *strums something else* Smelly caaaaaat, smel-ly cat, why aren't they feeeding you? Smelly caaaaaat, smel-ly cat.... *smacks his forehead and sets the guitar down, shaking his head to himself* Alright, so, guess whos birthday is next friday (july 4th)? I'll give you a couple hints, his name starts with an S, he's.....handsome, paternal, going to be 25...owns this journal. *loud cough* I just want fireworks on my birthday, that's all I ask. Wow that was corny. And I have nothig else to say. This update totally sucked. And I do realize the images in my journal do not work, thanks to the server I use for them being incapitated...I think I just created a word just now *laughs softly* Deal. [/ends pointless update] 33 comments|post comment

Woo... [23 Jun 2003|02:39pm] I waited til Keri had called her mum and taken a nap to write this. There's not much to say except the fact that we're having a girl! *grins* Secretly I wanted one all along...even though that sounds like I'm just saying that. We also got a nifty picture too. I didn't realize it til we were at the restaurant and when I started looking at it--well first I couldn't make out a damn thing, but then I just sort of died right there and then. When the doctor did the ultrasound and I saw her on the monitor my legs about buckled, too. I think, save the time I got to feel her kick, this is about the most real moment in this whole entire experience. *end mushy update* Oh and yeah, turns out we're farther along then we thought. Oh boy. And we've got a name...Isabella Grace. Isabella Grace McNally. Izzy. Liz. Bella. Grace. *country accent* It's like peas and carrots. I need to work on updates other then this subject *laughs* It's kind of hard to. 6 comments|post comment

MOREfm [22 Jun 2003|01:32pm] An update so soon? Yeah...;) I almost forgot to wake up this morning, I was such a zombie, and call into More FM, which is some Aussie radio channel. Maybe some fans tuned in over the internet, but all I really talked about was Harry Potter, David Beckham, Mark's bagpipe playing, our rubbish dancing, and my past part in a Guns & Roses cover band. I almost slipped out Keri's name and the baby but caught myself. I didn't really talk about the past, present, and future of BBMak, frankly because I don't even know. Sad, isn't it? I also checked up a little at our officially UK message board. Are the fans ever going crazy talking about my accent. What bloody accent? They're saying it's stronger. I don't see how, maybe from my short stay in England? Weird stuff rubs off on me. Maybe it's because they haven't heard it in a while. Oh well. Gotta love the fans. They're also going crazy at our US message board because Mr. Christian Burns came out from under a rock and posted something for them. They always go ballistic when we do stuff like that, it's nice. It makes me really want to come back. They're really the truest form of loyalty next to your partner. Oh yeah and they introduced me as "BBMak's lead singer" in the radio interview. Isn't that the funniest/stupidest thing you've ever heard? We're all lead singers. Sure I sing a lot on Into Your Head (buy buy buy!!!) but so does Mark and Christian. Ah well, I guess it's somewhat of a compliment. Better then the DJ calling me "the lad in the back." And on that note, I'm jetlagged and I'm going to sleep forever again. 5 comments|post comment

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